Stay In The Know:

A Naked Apology


I hurt you

and...I am sorry for doing so in a way that even after all you'd been through

you still never knew you could be damaged

I am so sorry for welcoming you in and then judging you when you got naked

like I told you to

I said Come As You are but what I should've said was

put a mask on

I made it seem ok for you to show me your scars

and tell me your secrets

but I gasped in disapproval and furrowed my unholy brow

as you undressed and exposed the most vulnerable part of you

I shunned you... cast stones

but It wasnt you..

I was just scared that my inability to heal you would be brought to the light

and thus my power gone

I didn't want to hurt you

I just couldn't lose my influence

I had mastered the art of smoke and mirrors

While I too bled beneath praise sheets

Your flesh reminded me of my insecurities and imperfections

I just wanted you to smile

and swallow the pain

like I had... for years

so much so the bitterness of my pain turned sweet

and my legions of lesions were more bareable as I focused on

your scars

I should've shown you my prosthetic leg

I can't stand on my own

you see my signature walk

is really

a result of loss

I can't stand alone... like I seem to

I fell so hard when you ran out the door that day

and hemorraged when others saw

I was an arrogant one trick pony

I was like the Great Oz

just a person who made a life of talking loud making empty promises

I ignored the needs of others I couldn't address

and sent people on suicide missions

their faith in me

unprepared and ill equipped and hoped they wouldn't return

because alone knew I could do nothing

But

if allowed I would like to make it right

If you would give me a moment I don't deserve

I want to take you to the

Cornerstone

to the presence of one who's Love will

Heal you

there will be no judgement

no disapproving looks

no judgemental stares

the Cornerstone will touch you

appropriately

beautifully

intimately

He touched me and took me in

He washed me and loved me to life

I should have done this sooner

but I was in love with myself

He will show you the mercy you know none of us deserve

He will revive your low beating heart

He took a beating for you so that you can choose to be safe from harm

He Loves you as you are

and will lead you to life more abudantly

He took the scales from my eyes

and now I see

He is the Light

I was wrong

and...

I am sorry

Sincerly,

the Churchys

Copyright © 2010 by Alicia Johnson

Lead Me Back - Morgan Harper Nichols
00:00 / 00:00